Tuesday, March 1, 2011

Faking an Orgasm, the history of Hollywood


i stand corrected. friends assure me there's a six second transmission delay during the academy awards, where any illicit word can be expunged. in fact, i wouldn't be surprised if all four letter (and other colorful and overused) words not programmed to automatically die.

ah, the smart actress must have realized how to make history. she didn't have to assassinate a famous figure, or pour gasoline on herself and strike a match. no, all she needed to do was open her big mouth. i'm very surprised no one had thought of doing it before.

yesterday, i objected to hollywood scream sex on the grounds it's phony and athletic. i'd also say the same for hollywood violence. certain directors know you have to blow up a gas-station or shoot a dozen people dead in the first five minutes. (last year's award winner: no country for old men.) admittedly i don't go to such films these days. as a kid i did, a steady diet of war films and film noir twisted my soul for life. and i loved it.

why, cause they gave me the pain and suffering only sex can bring. that's the secret of the movie industry. a special effect can create a sympathetic orgasm. unfortunately, as woody allen has maintained, sex and death go together. every parent experiences this conundrum. we're all laughing on the way to the graveyard.

celebrities identified with this mythical existence. and movies the epic tales which unite americans. as much as the french, we go to the flicks to talk about them later. it's as universal as the weather and more interesting. and every ad and bookstore flaunts a fake blond like marilyn monroe. as degas said about painting, 'you have to use the false to depict the true.'

what still stopped me at this year's awards: the sudden influx of shots from foreign films, so real they disturbed the fantasy. i would argue the optimism of ignorance what has kept america the idol of the world. and visitors can't help but be disillusioned. i myself love living in mythical pasts. i've had many of them in india, eastern europe, russia, and native-america. alas, having exposed myself to the realities of all those places my imagination shrivelled up. guess i'll have to go back to the science fiction of my youth.

here's my proposal for honesty in media. give it a browse: www.pbase.com/wwp/laughing alas, i'm really an entertainer myself and find fiction more fun than reality.